I am just about 22 weeks along now and I have to say, Emily has taken after her mother. By that, I mean that she is ALL gymnast!! I swear, yesterday she was practicing her can-cans...all day long...in the exact same spot. My emotions were getting the best of me yesterday and I began to get a little worried for her. For some CRAZY reason, I wanted to cry because I thought she was stuck in some odd position and couldn't get loose. Yes, I know that is crazy, but you have to understand, my emotions have been all over the place recently...poor Craig.
Well, I was relieved today when Emily FINALLY adjusted herself and I have been feeling her all over my belly. Seriously though, it feels like I have only felt her kicking in one spot for the last few weeks.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Emily Elizabeth Wright
Yes...Craig and I finally decided on a name for our little girl. We tried so hard to stay away from the top 100 list, but ended up choosing #1 on the list. I know...I know...Emily is supposedly "so popular", but, as a teacher, I have yet to have any students go through my classes with the name "Emily". Since we have been married (ten years ago), we have NEVER been able to find a name that we agree on. A few days ago, Craig thought of the name "Emily" and we both loved it!! After finding out that it was #1 on the list, we didn't really care.
Emily means: Industrious, Ambitious
We chose to have Elizabeth as the middle name for a couple of reasons. First, it was really important to me to have a name with a strong meaning. The meaning behind "Elizabeth" is: God has promised. I thought that was perfect, considering our history. Second, it was one of the few names that we thought flowed well with Emily.
Now, I shared our name choice with a couple of colleagues and they informed me that "Emily Elizabeth" is the name of the girl in the story book, "Clifford, the Big Red Dog". How ironic because Craig and I have a "big red dog". I don't know...I don't think it will be a problem at all. Its not like Emily is going to go around saying her first and middle name to everyone.
It is fun calling her by a name now. We no longer call our baby "it", or even "she"...we get to call her "Emily". I just love her name!!!!
Emily means: Industrious, Ambitious
We chose to have Elizabeth as the middle name for a couple of reasons. First, it was really important to me to have a name with a strong meaning. The meaning behind "Elizabeth" is: God has promised. I thought that was perfect, considering our history. Second, it was one of the few names that we thought flowed well with Emily.
Now, I shared our name choice with a couple of colleagues and they informed me that "Emily Elizabeth" is the name of the girl in the story book, "Clifford, the Big Red Dog". How ironic because Craig and I have a "big red dog". I don't know...I don't think it will be a problem at all. Its not like Emily is going to go around saying her first and middle name to everyone.
It is fun calling her by a name now. We no longer call our baby "it", or even "she"...we get to call her "Emily". I just love her name!!!!
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Hind Sight is 20/20
So...it is truly amazing to see what has come about from my four years of torture by way of infertility. Recently, Craig and I attended an evening service at church. At some point, Pastor Dean mentioned a new ministry that he wanted to get started and I knew right away that I wanted to be a part of it. The ministry reaches out to women through abortion clinics. I don't know the exact details of the ministry yet (it is all still in the work), but he talked briefly on how he wanted the women to know that no matter what choice they make that God still loves them with all His heart. It won't be a bunch of us standing outside a clinic with picket signs, but rather going inside and meeting the women, handing them gifts with information, etc. Possibly checking up on the women to see how they are doing and meeting up with them for coffee to just talk. I love it!!!
So...I talked to the Pastor who was put in charge of this ministry and she wanted to meet me for coffee to get to know me and see where I would best fit in with this new ministry. When we met, the first thing she asked of me was to share my testimony with her. She knew a little bit about our challenge and success through church meetings, but she didn't know any of the details. As I began to share with her, from beginning to end, the ups and downs...mostly downs, the heartaches, the struggles, etc. I ended up completely surprising myself when I just broke down...in the middle of the coffee shop. I was surprised because I was no longer in the depths of my depression, yet simply talking about it all brought so much back to the top. When I started to talk about our IVF procedure and seeing our five embryos on the TV screen...and then getting the call two weeks later that none of them took...I could barely get the words out to her. In a way, it felt so good to talk about it. I think I have only shared the whole story with one other person (others would hear the story as it was happening), and even then I couldn't get through it without crying.
When I finished my testimony, Pastor Tiffany said that I gave her goose bumps. She asked me if anyone has ever told me what came from the message that Pastor gave based off of my letter (I wrote a post about that message somewhere down below). I told her I had no idea. She shared with that there was such a huge response from women that day. So many woman came forward to receive forgiveness for past abortions because they have never been able to forgive themselves. She also said that there were a number of woman who were pregnant and considering abortion, but have made the choice to give their baby life.
I couldn't believe it!!! I remember the day Pastor Dean gave that message. I remember Craig and I walking away that day, in tears, saying that if our story helped to save the life of just one child...it would make the past four years worth it. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat!!!
I KNOW that infertility sucks!!! I KNOW the doubts and frustrations that it can cause. I KNOW the lies that Satan uses to feed you when you are in the midst of that torture. And I KNOW NOW that God can take the worst part of your life and use it for His glory. I can easily say that the worst part of my life was when I found out that I had lost my five babies...but you know...I look back now and I am so blessed that God could use my babies to save the lives of others. My babies had a clear purpose from God. Without them, I would have never written my letter to my Pastor. Without that letter, my Pastor would have never given his message on life...using that to speak directly to woman who have had abortions or were considering abortion. Without that message, those woman would have continued living a life of condemnation and listening to the lies that Satan kept feeding them. Without that message, those woman considering abortion may have gone forward with it. I am confident that I will see my babies in Heaven someday and until then, I will pass on their story to their new little brothers/sisters.
Don't ever give up!!!
So...I talked to the Pastor who was put in charge of this ministry and she wanted to meet me for coffee to get to know me and see where I would best fit in with this new ministry. When we met, the first thing she asked of me was to share my testimony with her. She knew a little bit about our challenge and success through church meetings, but she didn't know any of the details. As I began to share with her, from beginning to end, the ups and downs...mostly downs, the heartaches, the struggles, etc. I ended up completely surprising myself when I just broke down...in the middle of the coffee shop. I was surprised because I was no longer in the depths of my depression, yet simply talking about it all brought so much back to the top. When I started to talk about our IVF procedure and seeing our five embryos on the TV screen...and then getting the call two weeks later that none of them took...I could barely get the words out to her. In a way, it felt so good to talk about it. I think I have only shared the whole story with one other person (others would hear the story as it was happening), and even then I couldn't get through it without crying.
When I finished my testimony, Pastor Tiffany said that I gave her goose bumps. She asked me if anyone has ever told me what came from the message that Pastor gave based off of my letter (I wrote a post about that message somewhere down below). I told her I had no idea. She shared with that there was such a huge response from women that day. So many woman came forward to receive forgiveness for past abortions because they have never been able to forgive themselves. She also said that there were a number of woman who were pregnant and considering abortion, but have made the choice to give their baby life.
I couldn't believe it!!! I remember the day Pastor Dean gave that message. I remember Craig and I walking away that day, in tears, saying that if our story helped to save the life of just one child...it would make the past four years worth it. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat!!!
I KNOW that infertility sucks!!! I KNOW the doubts and frustrations that it can cause. I KNOW the lies that Satan uses to feed you when you are in the midst of that torture. And I KNOW NOW that God can take the worst part of your life and use it for His glory. I can easily say that the worst part of my life was when I found out that I had lost my five babies...but you know...I look back now and I am so blessed that God could use my babies to save the lives of others. My babies had a clear purpose from God. Without them, I would have never written my letter to my Pastor. Without that letter, my Pastor would have never given his message on life...using that to speak directly to woman who have had abortions or were considering abortion. Without that message, those woman would have continued living a life of condemnation and listening to the lies that Satan kept feeding them. Without that message, those woman considering abortion may have gone forward with it. I am confident that I will see my babies in Heaven someday and until then, I will pass on their story to their new little brothers/sisters.
Don't ever give up!!!
RED ENVELOPE DAY!!!
I have never heard about this day, but I'm glad I ran across it!! Apparently March 31st is "Red Envelope Day". On this day, we are asked to send empty red enveloped to the White House with the following written on the back:
"This represents one child who died because of an abortion. It is empty because the life that was taken is now unable to be a part of our world. Responsibility begins with conception."
I hope that the word quickly spreads about this day so that the impact will be grand.
Here is a link to the website:
http://www.redenvelopeday.com/
"This represents one child who died because of an abortion. It is empty because the life that was taken is now unable to be a part of our world. Responsibility begins with conception."
I hope that the word quickly spreads about this day so that the impact will be grand.
Here is a link to the website:
http://www.redenvelopeday.com/
Sunday, March 1, 2009
I Felt the Baby Move Today!!!!
March 1st, 2009...mark this day as the day I finally understand the whole "butterfly" effect in your belly. So many people have told me that when you feel the baby move it is like you have butterfly's in your stomach. I couldn't really imagine that feeling...until today. Ever since my 16th week, I thought that I was feeling the baby, and maybe I was...it just felt like someone was inside my belly pinching me. However, today was a completely different experience. Craig and I got in the car to go to church, and all of a sudden I felt this crazy tickle in my belly...one after the other. It was as though the baby was doing a summer-sault. It was absolutely AMAZING!!! As the day went on, I felt a few more "tickles". I loved it!! I cannot wait until I can feel the baby on the outside of the belly so that Craig enjoy the fun too.
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